My parents have been married 50 years. Today. We are at the beach celebrating. I spent some time thinking about how incredible their faithfulness is - and how much we have to be grateful for - and how many of my core beliefs are formed by their marriage and little daily lessons I've seen played out. So I made a list. I'd love it if you'd add memories or blessings in the comments.
1. Never skip a celebration.
2. Church Every Sunday.
3. And Wednesday
4. Unless you are on vacation.
5. Vacation every year.
6. Talk to people in line.
7. Make friends everywhere you go.
8. Hang in there with people even when it's hard.
9. Say sorry.
10. Let stuff go even if people don't say sorry.
11. Go to the fair.
12. Have people over for dinner.
14. Work hard.
15. Build retaining walls to hold up things. Big retaining walls.
16. Buy sparkly crystal glasses.
17. Use them often.
18. Let kids use them.
19. Remember people's birthdays.
20. Show up when tough stuff happens.
21. Take food.
22. Use the "you are special" plate.
23. Take your kids to work.
24. Pay your kids to work.
25. Let them use the money on fun stuff.
27. Do the dishes before you go to bed.
28. Go to museums.
29. Cheer on the Seahawks.
30. Consider other people's perspective.
32. Point out the mountains, rivers, flowers and anything worthy of a second look.
33. Give people time.
34. Take big risks.
35. Let mistakes be temporary.
36. Try again.
37. Try new food.
38. Cheer on people's wins.
39. Don't buy into drama.
40. Read all the books.
41. Talk about funerals, wills, death and resurrection. It's all a part of the deal.
42. Enjoy Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, 4th of July.
43. Go to the doctor.
44. Ask the tough questions. Information is better than guessing.
47. Put your faith in Jesus.
48. Don't quit.
49. Wonder why things work.
50. Find out.
I read the story of Hezekiah this morning. It’s in 2nd Chronicles if you want to read the whole thing. The short version is King Hezekiah wanted to have his people celebrate the Passover. According to the rules set out in the law this was quite the undertaking. Big gathering. Lots of rules. And if they broke the rules there could be great consequences. (Sound familiar)?
So the big day comes and a bunch of people got it wrong.
Should they have purified themselves? Yes. Was it important? Yes.
But I love how the king responds.
He prays for a pardon. He’s not minimizing the risk. He’s not recommending people ignore the rule. He’s asking God to consider their intent. Their hearts.
Listen. I confirm we need to be careful in these days. I’m taking seriously my response and advocating that others do as well. In no way am I recommending we ignore the recommendations of our heath professionals or disregard the governmental guidelines. Absolutely.
I’ve been thinking about my response to people around me in these days if Covid. Do I inspect their every action and judge how closely their lives are standing up to my standard of behavior?
Are we as a society using shame more than respect? Are we assuming from a glance we know what is happening with someone else and running to tattle? Could we perhaps try asking a few questions first? Or perhaps throw some grace in the mix?
I can’t tell you what to do. And trying to keep track of your movements in life will only lead me to frustration and bitterness.
So I’m going to social distance my attitude. I’m going to pray. I’m going to focus on intent. I’m going to set my heart on God and leave the judgment to him.
I've thought about writing a post many times over the past couple of weeks. Like all of you - my world is a bit upside down. Lots of events cancelled, normal patterns disrupted, concern for family near and far. I have been filtering my thoughts which have ranged from ranting (plenty of that already available without me adding my frustration to the mix) to snarky meme level humor (way funnier people have covered this genre which I totally appreciate).
But today I have something to say which may be helpful.
I was sitting at home last night listening to my kiddos chatter in the other room. A serious negotiation was taking place between the teenager and the first-grader who live here. A few minutes later I heard the little one explain the situation to her dad.
Little one: so - I wanna play Uno.
Dad: And - is she going to play with you?
Little one: She says if Mom does, she will.
That was the entire conversation. To borrow a phrase from the 13 year old - I was shook.
If I play the game, my eldest will join in. The little one will be thrilled.
If I don't play the game, the eldest will have a great excuse to not and the little one will be bummed.
The outcome depended on what this mama choose.
Friends - this is the truth for all of us in this crazy time. If we lead by example and show kindness then our kids and our neighbors and our coworkers will see a way forward. If we panic and hoard and exchange cranky barbs about our particular schedule or restrictions of the day then our kids and our neighbors and our society will as well. If we express care and are vulnerable about our fears without subcoming to despair then our kids will grow the ability to endure.
If mom will, she will.
My parents are not in the country at the moment. We've spent the last couple of days working on finding and securing flights. They'll be home Saturday. I'd love your prayers for safe travels.
I asked my mom in the middle of it how she was doing.
She said "I'm good, its a beautiful day and I've switched from singing Happy Birthday while I wash my hands to saying The Lord's Prayer". She explained reciting the prayer got her a mental timer for the 20 seconds for a thorough wash and gave her a constant reminder of where her help comes from. She didn't complain about the cruise line, the frustration or her fears. She gave thanks and pointed to God. And so it enabled me to do the same.
If mom will, I will.
At the end of this mess I want my kids to know that when I say I believe in God and in His care and provision that it wasn't just words. I want them to see that my faith matched my actions. I want them to hear me express my pain or anxiety and then choose in that moment to focus on hope and joy and gratitude. As Jon Acuff says 'fear is a feeling, afraid is a choice. Sometimes I have to choose hope 1000 times a day'. But I'm going to keep choosing hope.
What about you?
Listen up!!! Valentine’s Day is Friday and I would like to officially reject any part of it that makes the ones I love feel unloved. Fact is St. Valentine was a priest, single, believed in marriage, loved Jesus and knew everyone was wanted by the Father. So go big this year. Shout someone’s worth. Hug your kids, the neighbors kids, your nieces and nephews. High five and text and send cards to your single pals, worried friends, married friends, in relationships, divorced people, single moms and dads trying to hold it together. Loved. All of you. I have a hint for you too - if you are feeling left out or down or sad or whatever I've found the best pick me up is to help someone else feel less alone. Do the work this week to tell your people they are ALL loved.
This morning I didn't hit the snooze button. I dragged my tired body and my warm blanket into another room and sat with my journal and Bible. It had been a long time since I'd cracked open either book. Sure - I read my Bible on my phone grabbing a fast sip full of truth in between sorting my junk mail, pursuing Instagram and catching up on my Noom tasks. But to actually sit in a chair with my Bible and pause and pray? I don't slow down that often.
I've got a big list of things to accomplish this year. Books to read (36 ones I've been given or purchased, 100 total). Some weight to lose (those pesky last 5 pounds). My art class to finish (10 drawings to go). Several LARGE tasks at work (just keep swimming). But the sermon yesterday reminded me that none of it matters save a commitment to being in the word and following what it says.
So I dragged my body into my chair and this is what met me there.
"For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear. I will help you." Isaiah 41;13
My right hand is the one that writes all my lists. What I use to keep track of things. With it I do do do always keep doing. And it makes me tired.
And God promises to slow me down, to take my hand, to comfort me like a child, to go my speed and to help me. Oh goodness. What a great verse.
That's the Book: Revelation
Recently I had the great joy of spending a day at The Metropolitan Museum of Art. While there we saw all the greats; the beautiful ballerinas of Edgar Degas, Waterlilies by Monet, the bright eyes and cheeks in Renoir. The Homer Winslows reminded me of the bits of the Bible which tell history. Lots of color and detail which help readers - or viewers - to understand a culture and how humanity moved within it. Pretty. And factual.
We wandered through my favorite gallery where the lovely impressionist paintings live. These Van Goghs, Manet, and Monets evoke beauty and move my soul. These remind me of the books of the Bible which are full of songs and worship and poetry. Think the Psalms. Or Isaiah. Pretty Pretty Pretty. More symbols, fewer facts, still truth.
Then we wandered through the abstract art gallery. These paintings are interesting. They make viewers reflect and see things in a new way. They cause questions, challenge assumptions, and are full of symbols. They aren't supposed to be viewed the same way as the realistic paintings and they don't have the same effect as the impressionists. But they are still powerful. Just like the book of Revelations.
The book of Revelation is likely the most misunderstood and confusing books in the entire Bible. It's written by John who was one of the disciples of Jesus. He had a vision about the future and wrote it down for people to have some clue as to how the rest of human history would play out. I have a little hint for you before we dig into the book. Jesus wins.
Some of the themes which sink into my heart when I wrestle with Revelations carry me in hard days. I've got these verses posted about and when life seems too hard I read them out loud. Because the truth screams.
Jesus is the only one able to touch the problem of pain. He's perfect. Lovely. Holy. He stays the same.
And the four living creatures, each one of them having six wings, are full of eyes around and within; and day and night they do not cease to say, "HOLY, HOLY, HOLY is THE LORD GOD, THE ALMIGHTY, WHO WAS AND WHO IS AND WHO IS TO COME". Revelations 4:8
"Who will not fear, O Lord, and glorify Your name? For You alone are holy; For ALL THE NATIONS WILL COME AND WORSHIP BEFORE YOU, FOR YOUR RIGHTEOUS ACTS HAVE BEEN REVEALED." Revelations 15:4
Pain and destruction and darkness and death loses. Justice wins. Grace wins. We win.
And the devil, who deceived them, was thrown into the lake of burning sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet had been thrown. They will be tormented day and night for ever and ever. Revelation 20:10
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. Revelation 21:4
God is not done with the church. Even with her flaws and hypocrisy. He loves her. He still calls her, uses her, loves her, restores her.
I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16 So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth. 17 You say, ‘I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see. Revelations 3:15-19
Endurance is a large part of what the Christian faith preaches. Don't quit faithful one.
Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and for ten days you will have tribulation. Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life. Revelation 2:10
Revelations is a big, sometimes scary, powerful book with relevant messages to share with believers today. Life can be complicated. God is not simple. So the book of Revelations with all its abstract symbols and grand language gives us a glimpse into the mystery in ways the other books simply can't touch. Abstract is still truth.
And the one sitting on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new!” And then he said to me, “Write this down, for what I tell you is trustworthy and true.” Revelation 21:5
You'll find this walkthrough especially useful. The team at the Bible Project are the very best. I told you Revelations is complicated - it takes two videos to sum up.
For those of you who are looking for book recommendations here are a few on my current or just finished reading list.
Romance, history and lots of C.S. Lewis quotes? Yes Please! This book won the Christie Book of the Year award and I'm just loving reading all about how C.S. Lewis finally fell in love.
This is the best selling fictional novel about a child who is abandoned in the South Carolina marsh. I'm listening to this one on Audible and am about half way through - so if you're one of the people who have kept this novel on the best seller list for 20 consecutive weeks don't tell me how it ends. But wowsa. Its mesmerizing.
Fantastic negotiation book. I'm going to read this one again.
Classic children's novel - fun, intelligent and clever. This is my daughter's doctor's favorite book so we are reading it for something to talk about next time we see her.
This morning at church our kid's program was a hit. It was a hilarious show, charming and all the cuteness. The plot revolved around a church putting on a Christmas show and crisis hits when the delivery of costumes is all wrong. Shepherds become pirates, Angels show up as cheerleaders and the wise men don pirates costumes. Funny. My daughter was on stage and two nephews and a niece. A whole pile of other kids I call my own. Pride for all of them.
And then Mary and Joseph hit the stage holding the baby Jesus. Joseph looked a little bewildered by all the lights. His head was down and his face was set. I'm sure the original Joseph was the same. Mary had her eyes glued to the baby Jesus. I had an overwheming gratitude for the real baby who came at Christmas. For the one who left the perfect place and joined the mess for the sake of love. I found tears dripping down my cheeks. Truth is I cry every year when I look around at the kids I know telling the story I love.
I love Jesus. I think my two daughters can change the world. I think you can too.
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